Once upon a time, this blog was visited semi-regularly by six, maybe even seven readers. That time has passed. What once was an extremely arid, bleak landscape is now an extremelier aridier, and far more bleaky landscape. The succulent ideas still live here though, patiently waiting for the day when the rains of readership will return and they will bloom in an egotistical flurry. The no-humped camel lives here too (An evolutionary dead end, the no-hump camel is a purely fictional animal that wanders through my mind occasionally, drearily wondering why it can't get any satisfaction). And also The Dreaded Ravenous Gila Bunny lives here. In a cave, actually. In a cave with blind fish that have evolved very thick foreheads due primarily to the extremely painful cave forewalls to be exact. The Dreaded Ravenous Gila Bunny is a beast of such ferocity and tenacity, that it's gaping maw of slathering fangs frightens even the Abnormal Lizard-Pig of Blog Posts East-West! A renowned biologist by the name of Smiley Jones once found the cave by chance and was shocked to discover that the blindness in the fish wasn't due to the complete darkness of the cave and the lack of need for eyes, it was in response to a beast so fearsome that to see it was to die. Even in the dark. Of course as soon as he realized this, Smiley Jones was very quickly eaten along with some eggs and toast. Although The Dreaded Ravenous Gila Bunny normally feeds on no-humped camels, it "delights in the eating of anything brainy", it is purported to have said in its only known interview. Curiously, the interviewer survived the interview and it has been widely speculated that this was some sort of effusive derogatory remark towards the interviewer though the point was obviously missed at the time.
So here, in this cave with no light, in this desert with no rain, sits The Dreaded Ravenous Gila Bunny. Waiting for something. Anything.
1 comment:
Eat me!
Post a Comment